alison

I love my boyfriend so much! I can't wait till we get married!

hello journal,

I'm in a much better place than when I wrote last. I'm so happy here. I'm graduating soon, which is stressful, but I have the most wonderful man to support me through this rough time.
I know I've made mistakes in my past, but I'm just so happy to move on and find someone who loves me, and whom I never fight with, and where there's never drama.
I think that's why I haven't visited this archaic journal - I'm happy, I have no complaints.
I'm off to go snuggle up to the man of my dreams. 1 year and 1 month! And I love every second <3

hello, long time no see LJ.

And how are we?
We are well.

My 300 level classes are still boring, so I'm thinking grad school. I would love to study linguistics.

But my classes are fun I guess. I just want to be challenged.

Um, no drama as of late. Still with my BF. Love him much.

Quit my job promoting alcohol. As easy as it was, I still got bored.

Be at school for fall semester, living at home in summer and couch surfing in the fall.
A. o . K.

My room mates are good.

I'm broke though, but i LOVE being broke.

Cheap beer and Ramen. YES. Though - I've cut back smoking considerably.
I dunno what to say here.

My grandfather used to live in a chicken coop and worked double-shifts at the coal mine to put him and his sister through school. (He died of emphysema. He didn't smoke).

And I can't find the motivation to get an internship.

My grandmother ran away from home at 19 to work in D.C. during WWII.

And I can't pay my own rent.

My mom went to night school for 3 years while working a job so she could give me a better opportunity in life.

And I'm in debt.
My parent's aren't.

God bless my hedonistic life.

FUCK.

Today:
I think drinking only makes me depressed. Life is so God damned boring.

I got WASTED every day this semester. I only had one challenging class.
the two others were BS. The other was Creative Writing.

I got an A in the challenging class... linguistics...
a B in Creative Writing for attendance (though I was one of the best writers).

And the other two were just jokes, but I couldn't apply myself.

I'm drunk. It's 2:30 am . I have beer and 'friends' downstairs I should attend to.

Whatever.

I got a new ferret. I love her. A lot. She's fucking awesome.

I have no idea where my life is going. This gives me stress occasionally.
Peace.

I really have to stop drunk posting.

Planning a vacation is easy.
Organizing people is not.

I'm not sure what I may get myself into - 20 hours away from home with a person who doesn't know how to pitch a tent, a few others who may not last a week without their parents doing their laundry, and some who just talk way too damned much. All of them broke and cheap and have never been in a car for more than 10 hours.

But that's allright. It's fun to take control and organize.

School will be over tomorrow and my traditional bi-annual flu is showing symptoms - right on time. Every finals week.

I'm going to buy a pet.
Dog or ferret.

Probably Ferret. They're just more compact and portable.

Ummmm aarrrgghhh snow.

Grades look like A A B B.
Cool.

If fucking up had a name...
it would be this semester.

Let's break it down!

1) SCHOOL
Oh school. I thought you were too easy till I procrastinated too long. Alas! there is much to do. And not only do I need to find my own internship, but I also need to speak to my adviser. 2 things I'm obstinate about. Summer school seems a possibility. Which brings me to #2

2) Getting the fuck out of town
I've been dreaming of getting out of Illinois, living the cowboy dream in Nevada, but a few days in Ohio spent practically alone has taught me that I am, unfortunately, a social creature. Therefore, I'm doubting the decision to branch out to greener pastures and may be stuck in central Illinois for the rest of my life due to the anxieties of being alone.

3) My boyfriend is boring
Yes. He's sweet, he makes me laugh, he's dependable, he does what I say, he's alright looking. But I just have no idea what to do with him. I mean, I tune-out most of what he says because it's about LOTR or his parents! And he doesn't know how to set up a tent or fix a headlight in a car.... (really I know how to, I just asked him to do it so he could feel useful... fail) And he's a music major. But. He's really nice. And a safe bet. No arguments... he agrees with anything I do/say. Just so bored.

4) Getting evicted
I knew this was an inevitability. 2 room mates are moving out in DEC. Much notice?? A week. Who's going to pay their rent?? No one. Getting evicted. I'll find a place... but I rather liked my apartment and I plan to talk to the lessor about liability because goddamn if I can pay, but not the other 3 or 4 people living there. So then during finals week I also have to worry about finding a place to sleep and packing my bags. Fuck you boys or Orland. You fail at living.

"So you wanna be my boyfriend or something?"
"I thought I already was?"

And that was the extent of it.

And maybe I'm settling for now, but that's ok because he's so simple and easy-going that nothing I do will get us in an argument.

But anyway, there's a keg downstairs I should be drinking... but drunkness has become so monotonous.

*sigh*

Ruin my life.

The following will be published... and I think that's pretty funny. Definitely not my intention.

Dear Teacher:
You really
want me to submit
my work??
Don’t you know
how nervous
but excited…
and I’ll wait
and while I wait
I’ll daydream
And my daydreams
are about
me winning
and somehow
someway
someone
will see
this tiny poem
in this tiny
publication
and this someone
will think
I’m the best poet
ever
and I’ll be rich
and famous.
But –
daydreams only
and just because –
I don’t want
to be published,
this is my submission.

Falling behind in my Hypertext class, but winning at everything else. My neighbor is trading me - he'll make my web page if I write a paper. Though this may be a bad idea considering his 1.9 GPA and tendency towards procrastination.

Ah well. I love to write so.

My dad got laid off. My mom says there may be a 0% chance he'll ever work again.
He'll be 59 tomorrow.

I'll be 22 on Sunday.

Birthdays in general are beginning to become monotonous.

This semester has gone by too quickly for me to get my life together.
It may be another semester before I can graduate and join the terrible workforce. Though I'm not exactly complaining about possibly extending my college career.

My sister is getting a divorce. This is good.

Um. Hm.

Going to Columbus, OH for a week. Soon.
My room mate is getting a personal assistant. I'm not sure why - I feel as if she has enough time to do things on her own, but I don't blame her because I plan on borrowing him from time to time.

I haven't looked at porn in like 6 months. I tried once, but I just giggled.