alison

it's adorable
you waited three days to call
I'll call you textbook

but will I call back?

you said you wanted
to talk about my haikus
I told you I write -

when i've been drinking.
but now i'm very sober
fuck this writer's block!

dear cute english boy,
I promise we'll have coffee
(but spiked with whiskey)

Cheers!

the bar last night, the only thing to do during the week and especially Wednesdays. I met an English major and I learned that telling people I 'm writing a novel is somehow attractive? So I'll probably do it more often and make myself look like a pretentious asshole.


He tells me his favorite author is Vonnegut before I tell him the same and before I show him my tattoo, he's cool, we exchange numbers and go our seperate ways. I tell people I want to fuck his mind.
Drunken ramblings.

I was talking to a black guy, this was a few weeks ago, we were outside and he asked to hold my hand. I said No. He asked "Is is cuz I'm black" No, it's because I don't know you.

Later, his brother asked if I wanted to go back to his apartment, when I said no he asked "Is it cuz I'm black?"
WTF?

Reverse racism.

My life is a big silent scream.. out of elation or frustration, sadness, excitement, confusion mostly.

Rothbury 2009!

A festival about the music and somewhat about how many drugs you can take at once while still functioning. I'm done with that.

I've learned: Never take too much acid again, stop talking shit about the ex bc he's still a nice guy, hippie music isn't that bad, I can drive for 13 hours straight, flogging molly is the shit live, my body rejects caffeine pills after a while, hippies are not attractive, molly is awesome, traffic sucks, i'm not immune to sunburn, i'm entirely too privelidged to be able to see the dead live and be too spaced to care, I don't completely understand the attraction to nitrous, I love fireworks, but mostly it's about the people you go with that makes the experience worthwhile.

My phone is broken. I want to call someone and tell him it was nice to see him, but I don't think I would have all that much to say and I can't call  anyway so fuck it, I guess I'll listen to music and attempt to read but this book is too boring, they say it's a classic, but whatever, just because it's familiar doesn't mean it's good.

Did we not agree to stop posting drunk? We didn't actually - and promises are not always promises.

Flogging Molly at Rothbury. Pretty sweet, should I pack my steel toes boots?

I've started writing again. I love it.
It's nothing I would ever show to anyone but relieves stress better than any Rx drug.

Perhaps a novel someday, but everything always is, and everyone writes novels these days. So fashionable...

I wish my ex would have appreciated my academia more than he had, you know critiqued my shit. But I spose he wished he had a girl who was a geologist or something... still.

Common interests are uncommon.

As for boys I have none right now.

I haven't slept with (or talked to) the boy who'd pissed in my bed.. well, after he pissed in my bed. But what would you do in that situation?
I make jokes about him now. He ruined my feather cover!!

And the other boy, the socialist Athiest NPR comedic cute boy who claimed we were soul mates a year ago... lives in Springfield for the summer. I have a mini crush on him. But I won't see him for a few months, so let's see.

Who knows.
Let's get drunk and write a novel, yes?
Something postmodern

Instant love = boys who admit they love NPR

I re-met this boy last night
He's an athiest socialist
just like me
he told me months ago
that we were soul mates
because of my tattoo.

But that was when I was dating
and now I'm not

We talk about books
and the limitations of language
He makes me laugh
then we kiss.

I don't even have a phone number
a nonchalant goodbye
silently, I ask myself,
when will I see you again?

I'm considering going back on ambien and getting rid of my xanax rx. I haven't had ambien in a while and it might be interesting.

Dear world

I hope, and I've been counting on this for a while now, but the world will end in 2012. God help us.

What a miserable waste of human flesh we all are.

Have you ever had a desire so strong that it actually makes you get up and do something?
I'm moving to Vegas.
In a year.
Fuck Illinois, I think I could have a good life there.

Yesterday I worked a pub crawl for Old Style and got paid $100 to hang out with 20 drunk guys for 3 hours. A vice principal of a school was there. He was cute and slipped me shots when no one was looking.

I am fully committed to being a single independent lady. However, I'm frustrated that I can't hang shelves in my room nor install a car stereo.

I just stared at the wires for 15 minutes. How the fuck.

This guy slept in my bed the other night. To my horror I wake up to the sound of water and see him naked, holding his dick and pissing on my bed. When I kicked him out of my room he pissed on my stairs.

fuck. my. life.

He was wasted. Sorry man, that was your last fuck up. Now every one knows. And you suck.

I will however ask him to install my shelves.
Because that's how I get things done.

And he will too.

My ferret died.

He was in my room and he must have gotten out sometime during a party. And he ran into the street.

I'm sad.

This sucks.

We're too irresponsible for pets.

But I loved him a lot.
<3

Dear females:
I love your vague LJ pic where your hair is covering your face.
I have no bi-curiosity, but I believe the female sex is a million times more beautiful than the male. I love your curves and your hair.. your mystery, your intense eyes and the dangerous look you give me.

Woman - I love you. It's a shame we can't have sex, because your body is beautiful and I love your personality.

However, I need penis.

And males are gorgeous in their own right.

But... not as unique.

1. If S is equal to stupid things you say and do and V is equal to vodka, what is that chemical reaction that occurs to the frequency of S when the quantity of V is increased?

Answer: I don't remember. But puking in parking garages is hilarious.

Oh vodka.

From Kanye West's blog:

SOUTH PARK pt. 3 I WAS AT CHEESECAKE FACTORY YESTERDAY AND THE MANAGER BROUGHT ME A PLATE OF FISH STICKS... (in a sarcastic tone) uuuuuuum, GREAT! : /

Saturday, a trip to Missouri
on the way a pit-stop
a small interstate sign
to a memorial
I saw Mother Jones' grave
at Mount Olive, Ilinois

A town of 900 people
reminiscent of the 1950's
A small memorial
to the Ludlow and Verdin Massacres.
Beautiful Graveyard.

And on we went.

I have a cold.
Perhaps I'll go to Canopy Club tonight and see a show.
I think it's very rude when you hang up on me.

I'm going to stab my advisor in the face.
I can't get into any of the classes I need for my major.
Thus, I won't graduate on time through no fault of my own. Fucking ISU bullshit.
Also, if I can't get into classes I need to graduate next semester, then I'll have to take off school and work full time for a semester.
That blows.

Fuck Fuck Fuck.

When your test score is almost as high as your weight...

This is a good thing.

I may get straight A's for the first time in never.

Same old story.

When we "broke up" -
I was happy, saying,
finally I can save
passwords
for websites.

we got back together...
He said
"You can trust me
I know better now...
you need your privacy"

And silly me
believing.

We had a fight last night
same old story
he looked at facebook
MY facebook
my password was saved
and saw
a message
from a boy
asking for my number

and came to the party,
made a scene,
and ruined my night.
Again.

A week
and two days earlier -
I told him
I'll give you a week.
If you behave,
I'll stay.
If you don't -
I'll go.

He lasted two days longer than I thought he would.

At home for the holidays.

my home town is too boring
because I don't have many
or any
friends here.
But on the upside,
the bars stay open
3 hours longer.
Hoorah.

So I'm sitting at a computer
my plan was
to study and to read
but I'm not productive here.
And I think
and plan
to exercise and diet
until my mind wanders
on to something else.

Cable

I watch cable
only 3 times a year
when I go home

It blows my mind
the stupid shit
people will watch
instead of reading
a fucking book
and it works
it pulls you in
and you watch for hours on hours
until you don't know
what time it is
or what you've watched.
and you're a strange zombie person devoid of any intelligent thought or productivity.

These wre mediocre because I'm feeling mediocre.